Mr Trail Safety Speaks!

June 30 2022, Sacramento CA. California Dept of Motor Vehicles announced a new commemorative plate: the FOMOCAM. It honors the sacrifices of amateur camera-operators at the 2022 Western States 100 , who selflessly inserted themselves into glory between working professionals and team athletes. FOMOCAM embodies the tireless efforts of those who are called to collide with reality, as legends in their own minds.   Meanwhile, Colorado, not wanting to be left out, or leave money on the table, announced its two-tier FOMOCAM plate. Colorado bet that there would be an even larger number of FOMOCAM aspirants. The Tier One CO FOMOCAM plate is in honor of famed and exclusive Hardrock 100 . Only 147 of these plates will be issued by lottery, not counting the the 18 international rollovers and RD Dale Garland's Pick-Six. The Waitlist is reportedly almost 48.   The Tier Two CO FOMOCAM plate is in honor of the venerable Leadville Trail 100 , with its related LifeTime®™ family of races spannin...

My virtual buckle is down there, dammit! 2020 was a burning dumpster fire. Ultras got pounded. In the midst of all that, some events were able to safely proceed, and magic happened. Our friends at Ultrarunning Magazine have the stats . They do that way better than I. Predictions... Really?  The following is a tossed salad of the sober and surreal. You decide which. Marquee races like Western States and Hardrock may or may not happen, depending on how fucked up the 'Rona vaccine rollouts are, combined with Avoidable Dumbfuck Super-Spreader Events. Smaller races are also impacted. Currently LA County is on lockdown. Angeles Crest 100 is listed as happening, but we'll see after the winter storms and Bobcat Fire trail-washouts and tree deadfalls have their way. A huge majority of that course was incinerated this past October. The last word from the USFS was that it was closed for the next several years. There's enough trail work for all entrants and more, as the USFS is perenni...

You might get invited . The Few, The Wowed, The Chosen Soon top-tier ultras will be invitationals. Demand, and instant online signups are driving this. The HardRock 100 is a conspicuous example. Their field is capped at 145, because of remote aid-station space/logistic constraints.  Nobody is particularly happy with the lottery for whatever reason; full qualification details here .  Solution: make it an Invitational. That removes the whole lottery/convoluted entry process/RD Sharpie Thing. Then the disgruntled can bitch about that too. Most ultra-lotteries are cryptic events anyway. Correct me if I'm wrong.  Further down the list, change the qualifications. Like maybe have 2-5 qualifying 100s done before you enter the inner circle of elite 100s. Ditch the 100k or 50miler as a qualifier. It hasn't been 1986 for a long time now. Flying Wait-List Standby So you didn't get in to your dream 100, now you're wait-listed. Great! Lets say you're 93rd a...

The Western States 100 Lottery Anxiety, explained as a diagrammed sentence.  I've tackled the problem of the WS100 Lottery head-on—this explains it all in a logical, calm manner. Let me know if I can be of any further assistance in this matter. In the meantime, don't applaud, just throw money. [File under 'Diagrams and Charts/Weird Science]

Yours truly back in the day when a boy and his friend's shark could run a 100—Wasatch, 1992. CHANGES IN THE ULTRA LANDSCAPE The whole landscape of ultras have changed radically in the last 10 years. The day of RDs putting on races because they love the sport are giving way to corporate-sponsored series, with all attendant features and blemishes. Runners themselves have changed since I got into all this back in 1989. I came from a backcountry ski/travel/mountaineering focus. You self-insert, and self-extract. Runners now reflect the widely suburban culture, that expects free parking, deep swag-bags, medals and probably buckles for their 10ks. Races and their entry requirements are also part of this education process. A 50k is a different order of business than a 50-mile, 100k, and a 100-mile. We have legacy 100s that have not significantly changed their qualification requirements since Day One. Gutting out a 50 on the flats is not likely to get y...

I've always been big, just the sponsorship got small. Careless Whispers I was recently called an ultra wanna-be  in an acrimonious email exchange.  The accusation came about because a  disgruntled group-member  posted a come-on from The Clymb, which is Mary-Kay Cosmetics for dudes . I busted him, he got bent, and it all went into the weeds from there.  The exchange ended abruptly before I could tell the young hot-head that I would kill to be a wanna-be. I'm an ultra has-been .  This past year was a yard-sale of health issues, which culminated in a sharp POP  coming from my left-calf this past May. I tore something, and it could've been a lot worse. I went from running to a standing stop. Running in any form is off the table until that tear heals, period.  Right now I do a lot of walking, and the diet got leaner because trousers were shrinking.  Of course,  I blame Obama, global warming, and gay immigrant whales. If I had ...

Scott Jurek, leading in 1999 at Chilao (51mi). Tom Nielsen was gaining on him.             This post concerns the 2000 and 2001 AC100 races.  In the course of reviewing the facts, I'd realized that I had merged two races together. Thanks to chats with Jennifer Johnston and Tom Nielsen, I got straightened out. The story is more interesting that way.  1999: Prequel Scott Jurek and Tom Nielsen had locked horns at AC in 1999. Everything was ducky up until Chantry, when  Mr Murphy starts dropping wrenches in the gears. Tommy caught Ian Torrence on Mt Wilson [79mi give or take], and then Jurek at Idle Hour.  Idle Hour. 81 miles, in a Dark Hole in the side of a mountain.  That is a hard place to get served.  I think this was pre-packet radio days, and Ham-radio transmissions sometimes got lost or delayed bouncing off the canyons. There are 2 additional checkpoints, but nobody is quite sure where he is.  Or it seemed th...

Somewhere out on the WS100 Course, June 1993. Note: This post was originally unleashed to the UltraList on  December 10, 2011 12:11:26 PM PST Not only is this still largely relevant to WS100, but practically every other major 100 in the US, right now. Times have changed, and things need to be rethought. Hello, fun-hogs! Yes, its that time of year when thousands of anxious WS100 hopefuls agonize over whether or not they're in the magic circle. Are they 3-time losers in the 2nd degree? Nominated and EZ-Passed due to Extraordinary Accomplishments or somesuch? Busted out a 50-miler somewhere on a 2% downhill course? Probably not. So lets go down to the killing floor, and go to work. Here are some ideas. COMPLETELY ELIMINATE the 50-mile race requirement. This is dead meat, and has been festering like a zombie with bad manners for way too long. The new baseline qualifier would be a *FIVE prior 100-mile finishes* requirement. Yes, this is harsh. And pay phones are gone foreve...

Terrazzo and Desdemona take you through race day at the legendary Western States 100-Mile Endurance Run.

Actually, this is the gift you've been waiting to give that special someone. The Gift of Mr Trail Safety Bullshit. Think about it. What do you give that Special Somebody Who's Got Everything? Where do you go when you have Perplexing Questions? That's right. Mr TSBS is specially formulated so you can enjoy it as a hit-n-quit snack, or full-blown Roman Banquet. Here, have some wafers, Mr Creosote:  ================== DUBIOUS ADVICE 12 Advice Nuggets for Newbies & Others   Recently there have been a spate of anguished "drops" from the UltraList regarding content, tone, and suitability of the message, if not the messenger. Inasmuch as the majority of these messages appear to be from relative newcomers to the sport, or the List, some clarifications are necessary. MOUNTAIN BIKERS ARE PUSSIES Last summer I'd staggered to the top of Mt Wilson from Sierra Madre. I wasn't having an especially good day, but the water fountain was reason enough to continue. W...

"Your friends are definitely better than mine" This was the Voice Of Reason from Earl "The Rocket" Jones, as he admired my 24k bling'ed PIMP goblet . We were at the 3rd Outer Circle of the Western States 100 Finish Line, Sunday Morning Coming Down. The Firste Circle is the Ring Of White Chairs Inside The Barriers. The Seconde is The Laire of the White Nurse [being all double-bubbled and shit]. And the Thirde is round the outside, round the outside. Let's see. The main topic of conversation for all the WS Entrants was not about Hal or Nikki, it was whether Paris Hilton would be able to walk unassisted from jail after being on a reduced sperm-n-demerol regimen. Also, whether the Magenta Star Child would be able to commune with the Trail Faeries and git enuff water. But all this wilted from the mighty hear of the Krucible of the Kanyons. To everyone's Great Surprise, it was hot. Perhaps not hot enough to fry eggs on your visor, but close. There were a fair...