Mr Trail Safety Speaks!

Here’s my WR Kit. “Think what I’ve done for the sport…” I'm closing in on 5,000 miles. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. So much so that I need a FAST BOOST! Technology, narcissism and a credit card are gonna give it ALL to me. #StayHardly* This mystery is tailor-made for the Hardly Boys. And their sidekick Nancy "Drew The Short Straw." But all is about to change. She's fed up with being an apostrophe in a a high-asterisk occupation. The Hardly Boys just don't see her for what she is. She's not getting any. Frank Hardly has several drinks too many one night. "So, uh, Nancy, you like to play Tag, right? Well, how about tag... TEAM??" <crickets> Nancy stubs out her Lucky. She looks at Frank. ”You think I was bone yesterday?” ”You mean ‘born’, right?” ”No shit, Sherlock. I said BONE. Draw your own conclusions” Frank's eyes glaze over when he sees the Cuban fishnets. He wants to call his brother Joe Hardly, but knows he's at the weekly Rick Astley VR Zoom...

Inwardly I'm smiling. Photo courtesy of Louis Kwan. Don't hold it against him. After yesterday's Ray Miller 50k, I've only got two stiff legs. I've achieved a certain level of accomplishment when I heard shouts of "show us your balls!" seconds from the finish. But that was after I’d hurt the vert, run my own race, and had a great day; well in the future after the rosy-finger dawn rose over the whine-dork sea . The race is one of a cluster run that day at Pt Mugu State Park: 30k, 50k, 50 miles and 100k. Something for everybody, and if getting like worked hard, RD Keira H enninger will deliver, in spades. The 50k course is a lopsided 3-leaf clover and stem, in an approximate clockwise direction. If it was run counter clockwise, it would easily add 2 hours to the average finish. Keira has other things to do besides wait on your sorry ass, so be grateful. I was very glad I didn’t strap on the 50-miler. This will have to wait for a later date. Meanwhile,...