My Favorite Gun-Show Things















 

 

Beef jerky and do-rags, and dorks all in camo,
Reloads, factory and off-caliber ammo,
AKs and Mausers all tied up with strings,
These are a few of my favorite gun things!

Marpat and feldgrau and ebay’d Nazi doodles,
T-shirts shriek slogans from famed right-wing poodles,
Conspiracy theories that fly on brown wings,
These are a few of my favorite gun things!

Hot babes in heels are not often seen here,
Mainly paunchy white guys who are mostly has-beens peer,
Musing sour reflections on a trigger spring,
These are a few of my favorite gun things!

When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite gun things
And then I don't feel so bad

Comments

Dana Ross said…
Feel all Christmasy and like.
9:49 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Once And Future AC100 Course Record Beckons

Image
  "Some records are meant to be broken" I just saw this post from the AC100 Official Very Official FB page. The record here is Jim O'Brien's 1989 AC100 GOAT 17:35:48. Nobody's come close. Ever. Ben Hian admitted it was untouchable. Since the 2026 date is finally moved back to its nearly original Oct 6, somebody thinks they have a shot at it. Which begs the question: How? Reining in my usual withering sarcasm, but fully activating my years in the sport: here goes.  THE COURSE First. You’d have to run it on the original course. No cut outs. That means up over Mt [Sonny Boy] Williamson, no PGT [Pretty Good Tunnel] on Highway 2. Then, the original Cooper Cyn. The local MYLFs [Mountain Yellow-Legged Frog, you perv] will watch you thunder by. Again, no Pleasant Valley bypass trail. Up and over to Cloudburst, Glenwood Springs, Sulphur Springs. Mt Hillyer, with the Original Crotchless Gorilla suit. On to Short Cut via Charlton Flats. Down the Edison Road to Newcombs. Up a...
Read more

Kamp n0Rm, Year Zero-Zero

Image
  Date: Thu, 25 May 2000 07:46:29 -0700  Greetings All: It's a brand new Millenium, and ever'body's all set to go to what used to be called "Kamp n0Rm". Well...n0Rm's not in charge any more, but Tradition Is Everything, so here it is, just like last year. ================================ Dear Diary: I think I have Saturday all worked out for the 3000 prospective WS Runners. After I put on a shirt and some really sweat-inspiring stiff Levis, my day begins. 0300: Inspect busses for signs of drug use. 0400: polish glasses. 0500: Throw everything into the WS Command Vehicle, warm up engine. 0530: Load extra pairs of Ice-Pants® and ice-hats onto roof-rack. 0545: Hope that cocky young asshole Boisseree doesn't show up with his loudmouth pal Gassan(?) Gasstown(?) Gasstune(?) from LA. 0600: Begin writing my speech for the morning. Be sure to leave some room for spontaneous applause and shouts of "Stand Up!!!" Play along. Have someone take names and plate...
Read more

Tarahumarans And Ultras

Image
This seems apropos somehow The Tarahumaran/Raramuri runners of northern Mexico have an exalted ultra reputation. Their legendary running skills have cyclically transfixed ultras here in the USA going back to the early nineties. Coming out of deep, remote canyons in Chihuahua, the optics were magnetic. What gets lost in the media pixie dust is that they are desperately poor, sustaining themselves in a harsh landscape, and beset by loggers, narcos, and an indifferent ruling class and government. Starvation is a constant threat, now exacerbated by global warming climate change. Here it comes: “Born To Run” McDougall’s “Born To Run” book is often cited as a primary source on the Raramuri. Last time it was mentioned by an aggrieved SJW who was newly woke on ultras, I nearly shot coffee out my nose. Wikipedia can be like that. But McDougall’s done well with it, bullshitting TED talks in Davos etc. I get it, writing doesn’t pay much, and Davos can be fun.  Rewind! The Raramuri h...
Read more