KCRW Pledge-Drive Premium Modest Proposal

We all know about KCRW's infamous Pledge Drives. Yabbering sincerity. Auntie Ruth hectoring YOU about reading other people's NYT, especially since its available only in translation here in LA.

Its hard work being a cutting style-leader, having the latest murmured Brit-pop and shoe-gazer geek chic loaded up on your iPod. And frankly, most of you are guilted into it. You, humble KCRW listener, want something more to show for it. And Aunt Ruth wants a better bottom line.

Enter the KCRW Pledge-Drive Premium Modest Proposal. I propose the following Donor Level--The Double Golden BareBack Angel CD Special. If you're a guy, you give $30k, and you get a weekend suite at Shutters, unlimited mini-bar & room service, and the lissome 15 year old girl of your choice.

The Enquiring Mind might ask "Where's the CD in this?"

O ye of little faith. That's the 15 year old girl, and whatever it takes to get you thru the nite, all right, all right.

And for the ladies, we're still working on that one. Maybe something along the lines of a Gigolo Spa Experience, with the male element to be determined from a spectrum of Billy Corgan on one end to Brad Pitt on the other, with scenic byways including Carrot-top, Jonathan Pryce, and Dick Cheney for those so inclined.

Act now, before Bill O'Reilly gets his loofah into a twist, and co-opts it for his own purposes.

this is in or around west of the 405 Curtain


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