A Pretentious Fat Koach, er, Man regales the unwary with details on stretching....
I'll Dance With My Reefer
A few minutes ago I took off my shoes,
And balanced against my refrigerator.
The calf raises I commenced to start,
I'll do it again later.
I did 45 slow raises with each leg.
I weigh 270 lbs today, [sans clothes].
I fronted my bulk against cool white,
The door against my nose.
As I slid against the enamel finish,
My "he-boobies" a-squeaking,
I was glad I was facing front-to-back,
Or it would have been butt-hairs I'd been tweaking.
I'm glad I can share this with all of you,
I know you follow my gist,
Because each and every one of you,
Are my friends upon the List.